AN INTRODUCTION TO A NEW LIGHTHEARTED MEDICAL SERIES CALLED "SHOTS"

This is the first edition of " SHOTS ," designed for Families Online Magazine , so be sure to save it because there is no doubt that one day an original copy will be very valuable. Of course, you must be certain to advise your children, especially the youngest, of the hiding place, preferably your bank vault drawer, because it will have to become an antique before the value becomes significant. That's usually held to be about 100 years, but if your descendants are desperate, they might be able to cash it in for a good sum about 50 to 75 years from today. Mark this date carefully for future reference.

  What is the objective behind the creation of " SHOTS "?

" SHOTS " is designed to be a reflection of the impressions gained after 55 years of study, practice, and teaching by a retired physician. I am that physician, and I will be reporting on and interpreting medical and related news that may or may not appear in the newspapers or on TV, but which, in my opinion, includes important information of which you should be aware. Naturally, it is impossible for me to cover "all the news that's fit to print," but I will at least attempt to provide you with insight into topics of value to your health and welfare. Whenever these topics offer the opportunity to "inject" a bit of humor, I intend to add a "shot" in the form of a relevant cartoon, and/or some poetry. My purpose, therefore, will be to provide knowledge laced with a tinge of laughter. Please join me in what I hope will be a pleasant journey into the lighter side of medicine.

Don't Bother to Ask if There's a Doctor in the House

How come there never seems to be a policeman around when a car passes you going 95 miles an hour, weaving in and out, and with a driver who is probably dead drunk? Worse, yet; how come there never seems to be a doctor in the house when someone needs a prescription, or just needs help? Well, if a police officer actually saw the intoxicated driver it wouldn't be long before a chase would ensue, but if a doctor is actually in the house you can bet that you will probably never know. How come?

Recently I received several newsletters from the State of New York Department of Health concerning a growing problem; physician misconduct. If a doctor writes a prescription for a family member and neither examines nor keeps a medical record for that person, he or she may find himself or herself caught up in New York's medical conduct system. This is one of the least obvious ways for a doctor to court trouble. Other more glaring mistakes involve scheduling an attractive patient for the last appointment of the day and then dismissing the staff, or allowing a patient to bring gifts while also scheduling appointments for no apparent reason.

Did you ever stop in at the neighbor physician's house to ask for help with a relative that came by and is now sick? Don't get angry with the doctor if your request is refused. This is poor medical practice; unless records are kept along with a complete history, physical, etc. You are stepping on the doctor's toes, and if a poor result of this off-the-cuff treatment follows, you may be letting your doctor friend in for serious consequences.

Altogether, in New York State, there are almost fifty ways for a doctor to get into trouble through behavior falling under the guidelines of professional misconduct. The range of possibilities includes everything from getting a medical license fraudulently to refusing to treat someone due to race, color, or creed.

Cartoons and Poems following each article are created and copyrighted by Dr. Ackerman and cannot be copied or reproduced without his permission. Copyright © 2005 by Marvin Ackerman, M.D.