More Than Books
 With a great curriculum in our homeschool, I was much more confident that this could be
done. All the homeschooling moms I had connected with had assured me that nothing could beat
the benefits of one-on-one learning that homeschooling offered. They were proud to refer me to
numerous articles and studies that said just that. After only a few short months, I could see that
they were right. Not only was my son up to par on his grammar skills but my daughter, the fourth
grader, was well ahead of her public school friend. When she would talk about her lessons, her
friend would reply that she wasn't "doing" that in school. Now the only thing bothering me was
the social aspect of homeschooling.
As much as I found myself ruffled when asked "What about socialization?", inside I was
asking myself the same question. My son detached himself from his long time public school
friends. At first I would try to figure out why he no longer wanted to play with them. His answer
to my probing questions was merely that he didn't want to "hang out" with them, he was not
allowed to "do the things they do" and just wasn't interested.
My daughter had left behind the only one close friend she had in school. She had always
had a hard time making friends, being a shy, quiet girl who didn't follow the crowd. She was not
into clothes, hair and other interests that her rapidly maturing schoolmates were interested in.
She was an outdoor, sporty girl that I guess could really be translated into a tomboy. She
continued to play with her friend but gradually saw how the phone calls and playdates were
dwindling since there was no longer the daily contact of being in a classroom together. Perhaps
out of sight, out of mind would apply here?
I knew it was up to me to step out of my own comfort zone and make a new social life
for them. Most importantly, I wanted them to meet other home schooled children and form
friendships with children who had something in common with them. After the public library, the
internet would be my second choice as a resource no homeschooling mom can be without.
Simply putting "homeschool groups" in the browser gave me thousands of support groups to
look at.
With so many links, I decided to narrow down my search and included my county and
state in a second search. Now I found several groups in my own backyard that offered support in
all different ways. I was looking for field trips, sports, club and other moms I could exchange
ideas with.
The group I was drawn to most was specifically for homeschoolers in our county. I was
very happy to find that there were over one hundred families in this group with children ranging
from newborn to seventeen years old. I emailed the director for information and decided to
attend the next monthly meeting that was held at a local ecology center. I don't know who was
more surprised when we walked into that meeting room and saw dozens of moms talking and
dozens of children running around together. What I liked most was that children were playing
together in assorted groups. There were teenagers helping kindergartners and ten year olds
playing with younger children. And the groups were not limited to boys or girls only. The
calendar that was passed around listed field trips, sporting events, art clubs, science clubs, 4H
meetings and more. I would soon find that the problem would not be getting out socializing but
knowing when to limit our activities. By the end of the meeting I had signed up my family to be
a part of this wonderful group.
When looking for a support group, I recommend you ask:
1. Are they a group that physically meets and goes out on field rips or are they a "chat" group
that strictly socializes by internet? Some groups rarely meet but keep a steady conversation via
the internet. This may not be enough to sustain you and your children, especially if you are not
taking part in activities from your public school days.
2. Are they secular or non-secular? Some groups are religiously based and will ask you to sign a
statement of faith acknowledging that you agree and share in their beliefs. Activities are
sometimes planned around their beliefs. A non-secular group is open to people of all religions
and beliefs and is usually a bit more relaxed.
3. How much time and work will be expected of you as a member? Many groups will expect you
to either be a part of a committee or donate your skills and knowledge as in teaching a co-op
class. Some groups will have a committee already in place that prefers to plan all outings and
events which means less will be expected of you. Make sure you know how much you are
expected to do so you don't end up with too much on your plate.
I'm happy to tell you that our group was a wonderful addition to our homeschool plans.
My son and daughter both enjoy the bimonthly ice skating days as well as the sporting events
each month. They have played baseball, basketball, kickball and bowling with the children from
our group. Field trips have been both fun and educational and have included musicals, ballets,
plays, parks and museums. My son is enjoying friendships with boys who are younger than
himself as well as teenagers older than he. But I think what my daughter said answers even my
own question. "I have more friends now than I ever did before. Just look at my address book!"
Socialization? Got that covered!
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