1. When it reaches 34 degrees above zero you roll out the backyard slip-n-slide and spend the afternoon gliding on your stomach honking like an Pacific seal.
2. You wear your thermal underwear instead of nylons to formal occasions (and no one notices).
3. You use the wrong end of the snow shovel and still finish the driveway in less than 30 minutes.
4. You read by the 20 watt light in the refrigerator to combat Seasonal Affective Disorder.
5. You demand to leave your boots on during a pedicure.
6. To save time shopping you snowmobile through Walmart (causing several prices to rollback as roar by).
7. To lose weight you take your goose down coat in for liposuction.
8. You spend all day Saturday frustrated at ice fishing (you can't get the boat motor to start).
9. You're arrested for pointing a gun at a groundhog and telling him he has 10 seconds to see his shadow or he's stewmeat.
10. When the clerk at Dairy Queen asks you what kind of Blizzard you would like you begin to sob uncontrollably.
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