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In my private counseling practice in north Texas I am becoming more aware of how prevalent sexting has become. Teen, and sometimes pre-teen, boys and girls are sending one another sexually provocative, and often explicit, photos and messages to one another on their cell phones. Even girls at sleepovers are sometimes taking nude photos of one another to send to boyfriends. Don’t assume that these are kids from homes where parents don’t love or care for their children. The ones that I’ve been recently involved with involve honor students, cheerleaders and kids that attend religious services with their families.
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How to Say No and Keep Your Friends, 2nd Ed.
A must back-to-school reading for your teen!
 Too Smart for Trouble
Helping grade K-4 children think on their own!
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A survey conducted by AK Tweens indicated that 30% of girls ages 9 to 15 said they have sent explicit messages or photos of themselves. And in 2008 the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy found that 20% of kids 13 to 19 had sent partially or completely nude photos of themselves to someone they knew. These messages and pictures generally spread like wildfire and kids seem to be unaware of the life-changing consequences that can occur.
Among my clientele I’ve even seen pedophiles involved encouraging kids to begin this activity. Both boys and girls can be vulnerable at these young ages to inappropriate attention from older people and can be confused but also flattered. This will become a frightening nightmare when the legal system gets involved.
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In addition, in many states the laws do not distinguish between a teen who sends a nude photo to another under-age teen from a pedophile. Either, if convicted, could be required to register as a sex offender.
So what can a parent do? First, realize that although 71% of teens own cell phones does not mean that your child should have one unless that child seems extremely mature and responsible—and you may want to limit the usage to just phone calls—no texts. Monitor how much your child is on the phone--it should not be 24/7. Phones should not be allowed in their rooms after bedtime. If you have a pre-teen or teen, talk to them about this subject and discuss how you would want them to handle a situation like this. Express how inappropriate and disrespectful it is—as well as illegal. Discuss the repercussions that can occur. Talk about boundaries and why we need them. (Editor’s Note: Sharon Scott is the country’s leading expert on helping kids manage all kinds of negative peer pressure. Consider buying her classic parent guide Peer Pressure Reversal: An Adult Guide to Developing a Responsible Child, 2nd Ed. and her best-selling book for teens/pre-teens How to Say No and Keep Your Friends, 2nd Ed.)
None of this will be fun… yet like anything else, you would do anything to protect your child from danger. This is another danger you need to make them aware how to handle.
Copyright © 2010, Sharon Scott. No reproduction without written permission from author.
P.S. Please see my other column SmileNotes Performance Machine.
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Sharon Scott, LPC, LMFT, is an internationally recognized family counselor with a private practice in north Texas. She is considered the leading expert on peer pressure having trained more than one million people across the U.S. and in Australia, Canada, Switzerland, South Africa, Spain, Malaysia, the Philippines, Turkey, and Micronesia in her proven techniques. For information on bringing Sharon to your community or school to present one of her 29 dynamic workshops for children, teens, parents, or educators, please see her website www.SharonScott.com .
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Listen to
Families Online Radio Interview with Sharon Scott
Books That Work!
By Sharon Scott
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Sharon is the author of eight award-winning books including four on the topic of peer pressure.
 The guide for parents/educators on how to peer-proof children and teens is Peer Pressure Reversal: An Adult Guide to Developing a Responsible Child, 2nd Ed.
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Her best-selling book for teens, How to Say No and Keep Your Friends, 2nd Ed., empowers kids to stand out—not just fit in! A follow-up book for teens, When to Say Yes! And Make More Friends, shows adolescents how to select and meet quality friends and, in general, feel good for doing and being good.
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 Sharon also has a charming series of five books for elementary-age children each teaching an important living skill and "co-authored" with her savvy cocker spaniel Nicholas who makes the learning fun. Their book on managing elementary-age peer pressure is titled Too Smart for Trouble - More Info.
Peer Pressure Experienced by Teens, Adolescents and School-age Children. Parenting Advice.
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