Book Review – Adoption
“From Fear To Love”
By Sylvia Cochran – Parenting by the Book – From Fear To Love: Parenting Difficult Adopted Children
Publisher: Post Publishing
Publication Date: March, 2010
Have you ever read a parenting ‘how-to’ book that you just couldn’t put down? I know, I haven’t either. This one is different.
Once the reader makes it past copious pages of praise for the author, s/he realizes that From Fear To Love is filled with gems of wisdom, nuggets of ‘must know’ information, cute drawings, real life examples and chapter summaries that break down even further what has already been expertly packaged into easy to digest facts.
In short, From Fear To Love is an excellent parenting book that focuses on helping moms and dads of adopted children, but it is truly apropos for parenting any child with even a hint of special needs, giftedness or simply having been beaten up by the world. In spite of its relatively small size and easy language, the information packs a powerful punch. Written in conversational English (and devoid of the jargon so common to books written by psychologists), Bryan Post challenges parents to re-think the lessons of parenting they have learned from so many (frequently unsuccessful) other parents.
Perhaps the greatest watershed moment occurs when the author discusses “the stress model,” which causes a child to act out inappropriately. Whereas common wisdom would dictate that the child has to bear the brunt of disciplinary action, the author actually points out that the parent must take responsibility for whatever s/he did to cause the youngster to act out in this fashion to begin with.
Plan on reading through From Fear To Love once just to find out what the author will say next. The second time around, have a highlighter ready and make some notes. This is an excellent parenting book that lends itself to personal study, for discussion groups, as a workbook and also for getting ready for the addition of an adopted child.
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