jack-o-laternFunny Halloween Jokes — Halloween Poems

Silly Halloween Poem

‘TWAS HALLOWEEN NIGHT

‘Twas Halloween night as I leaped from my bed, With thoughts of amusement going through my head.

Turned off my computer and thought as I may Of vampires of old and vampires of today.

Of spooky old movies and Halloween parties, Of course trick or treating (hope they don’t hand out Smarties).

And witches and ghosts and gravediggers, I fear, So that old haunted house, I will never go near.

When you see spooky places, just take my advice, And don’t go in rooms filled with ghosts, bats, and mice.

So don’t risk your life going looking for spooks, Just go to a party with some good friendly kooks.

Or gather your family, carve a pumpkin and think What to have your kids do, and go pick up a drink.

Tell a joke to your friends, but be careful, you’ll see That a couple wrong moves might mean eternity.

Now put on that costume and dress yourself up. You can be Ninja Nun or that RCA Pup.

But be very careful or else you might see
That ghosts and vampires aren’t really PC.

So now you can think, as you turn out that light That there’s no such thing and that you are all right.

Look under your bed, though, and then you might see…

Nothing! We aren’t afraid of ghosts now, are we?

Halloween Jokes

Q. What did the Mommy ghost say to the baby ghost?
A. Don’t spook until your spooken to.

Q. What kind of protozoa likes Halloween?
A. An amoeboo!

Q. Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
A. He didn’t have the guts.

Q. What happened to the guy who couldn’t keep up payments to his exorcist?
A. He was repossessed.

Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A. Frostbite.

Q. What do Skeletons say before eating?
A. Bone Appetite.

Q. Why did the Vampire get fired from the Blood Bank?
A. He was caught drinking on the job.

Q. Why do ghosts have so much trouble dating?
A. Women can see right through them.

Q. Why aren’t there any famous skeletons?
A. They’re a bunch of no bodies.

More Halloween Jokes, Poems, Stories and Songs

Scary Halloween Poems

Ghost Town- A Scary Short Story

Silly Halloween Poem

Halloween Songs

Witches and Ghost Jokes

Monster Jokes– Mummy Jokes

Pumpkin Jokes

Skeleton Jokes

Vampire Jokes

Pumpkin Patches

Halloween Crafts

Make A Halloween Wreath

Pumpkin Stencils

Pumpkin Carving Patterns

Make Kids Halloween Costumes

 

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Sue Miller

Sue loves everything about Halloween and has brought together the best Halloween party recipes, Halloween jokes, costumes, crafts and decorations to make your Halloween the best ever!

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