Mom’s Multiple Choice: Promises or Threats?
Parenting Humor By Cheryl Moeller
Manipulative, absurd, and impulsive statements.
It’s hard to take mom seriously, when she makes these kinds of promises (threats)…
If you don’t finish your essay for English class…
1. You will be grounded for the rest of your life.
2. You will have to deal with Dad when he gets home from work!
3. I’m going to post your unfinished assignment on an expressway billboard where there’s lots of traffic.
If you don’t eat your vegetables…
1. The starving people in the world will be very angry at you!
2. You’ll eat it for breakfast.
3. Your other food won’t dissolve in your stomach for six years.
If you don’t clean your room…
1. I am going to clean it myself and then you’ll feel bad.
2. I will take the batteries out of your transistor radio.
3. I’m going to give all your stuff to someone who will appreciate it.
If you don’t do your homework…
1. You’ll flunk and then you’ll go through the rest of school with your next youngest sibling.
2. I’ll do the homework for you.
3. I’m going to ask the principal to put this on your permanent record.
If you don’t play with your little sister…
1. I’ll make sure you don’t see your friends until you are 60.
2. Spacebook, My Face, you are off all of it.
3. I will personally tell Santa Claus and not spare any details.
If you don’t clean your plate…
1. What will people think?
2. They won’t name a NFL team after you.
3. I hear the bubonic plague is making a comeback.
Cheryl Moeller cranks up the spin cycle on her washing machine and life to help parents cope with too much laundry, raising preschoolers (on 12 hours of sleep per year), surviving teenagers, pleasing relatives, understanding spouses, and the 1,000 other challenges. She uses her over-the-counter humor to make parents laugh until it feels better.
Cheryl is a sister, a wife, a mother, a daughter, a niece, an aunt, a granddaughter, a friend, a volunteer... well you get the idea. Let.s just say she.s a lot like you and has decided the best way for us all to cope is to laugh (don't try to inhale at the same time, it only makes matters worse).
Cheryl is a wiife to Robert for 28 years. Mother to Duke, Missy, Pooka, Skippy, Megs and Kenzie. One dog - Katie. One fish - Skyler. Two gerbils - Hannah and Lily. Cheryl cranks up the spin cycle on her dryer and life to help parents cope with too much laundry, raising preschoolers (on 12 hours of sleep per year), surviving teenagers, pleasing relatives, understanding spouses, and the thousand other challenges. Read more of Cheryl's humor at www.momlaughs.blogspot.com
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