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Family Funny Stuff

You Know Gardening Is Not Your Gift, If...

By Cheryl Moeller, from One Swede to Another
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Your roadside stand customers offer to pay you, if you'll keep your vegetables.

Your pesticide company sprays you instead.

You hire a lawyer, to defend yourself, from the class-action lawsuit the locust file against you.

You're able to grow more mold in the desert, than veggies in your garden.

You hire the United States Secretary of Agriculture, as a consultant, to get a row of radishes to sprout.

Your heart tells you yes; your knees tell you no.

Your weeds are your best friends, not your enemies. (You figure, at least with the weeds, something is growing.)

You don't have fourteen trillion zucchinis to pass out in late August

Your sweat is how you water your garden, causing flooding to kill your plants.

You buy veggies at the store and then lay them around in your garden, to impress others

Your woodchucks know your first name and you attend their son's high school graduation.

You attempt to rototill your driveway.

Your neighbor's compost heap wins first place in the county fair, instead of your garden.

You drive your spade deep into the ground for the first time and lights flicker in the neighborhood.

You planted on New Year's Day, because the seeds were on sale.

Your rabbits actually prefer the plastic vegetable display on your kitchen table.

Your slice of cheese, in the bottom of the frig, is the only thing green growing on your property.

Your zucchini is bought by the United Starts Defense Department, for artillery training.

The only Burpee in your garden is from indigestion.

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Cheryl Moeller

Cheryl Moeller is the mother of six, a blogger, an author, comedian,

We hope you enjoy these funny stories about and for moms.

Her book Homeschool Your Preschooler on $1 a Day is packed with simple, creative suggestions for engaging young children in a host of areas.

In this interview Cheryl discusses the opportunities that parents have to kindle curiousity and love for learning during the preschool years. Drawing on her experiences of homeschooling, she offers suggestions for age-appropriate engagement with young children.