parenting adviceparenting advice
Do you have a Suggestion for Topics?

Words Can be Weapons

by Kelly Croslis

We live for compliments. Hearing someone tell us we are beautiful, or sweet. Hearing that we are a best friend or good at something, makes us feel better about ourselves and gives us self-esteem. But what happens when we don't here those words? What do we think then? Unfortunately, many children hear them each day.

We have become a world of overachievers. Things need to be done right away, no emotion, no arguing, just do it. Is it realistic? Not really, but we expect it anyway. Since we are living a life of getting ahead, we expect our kids to be the same way sometimes. Then forget that they are kids. How many times have you heard a parent in a store, telling their child that they were over-reacting because they couldn't have something, or were being a drama queen because they skinned their knee. As they grow up and continually here these things they begin to believe them. They think they can't do anything right, their self-esteem falters and they become lost in themselves.

Have you ever heard the parent at a soccer game, yelling at their child that they were a failure because they missed the winning goal, or being told they were wasting their lives because they got a B on a report card and weren't going to get into an Ivy league school. It is amazing what we tell our kids and even more amazing that we don't see what it is really doing to them. With this attitude, we are creating a group of kids that do not believe in themselves, the world, and especially not the future. What would you do if you heard someone saying, "only two more years and we're free of kids I would think it would not be a good feeling, you would feel like you were a bother, in the way and unwanted.

It may sound harsh that a few words could shape a generation so profoundly, but as adults we know how it feels when we hear something negative about ourselves, imagine what that feels like to a child.

A Thought:

******************************************************

For what has been and what is now and what
is yet to be, gives me every reason to believe.
Love knows my name, sees my need, give me hope
covers me, even through the middle of the storm.
Love has no fear, finds no blame, the truth will
never change. Love has the final word.

Parenting Advice Archive

Popular Baby Names


Family Therapy Psychologist Advice Online

Moms are People Too

Child Language Development

Kids Disability

Child Development

Christian Parenting

Singleparenting

Adoption

Transracial Adoption

Kids & TV Violence

Teen Brain: A Work In Progress

Helping Your Children Navigate Their Teenage Years: A Guide for Parents

Teacher's Advice


Psychologist Advice